No Matter How Hard You Try

The problem with people is that whenever they come across something they think offensive, they would think everything that’s said about him/her is bad. It’s like saying you’ve read an entire piece of story for an oral reading when in fact, you just schemed it.

Recently, I took a leap of faith. It’s not something concerning love life. It’s about knotting ties with someone I hated before.

I really don’t know why I hated her. Maybe for the fact that she’s got a reputation with relationships before that’s why I think she can’t be trusted with my best friend. Maybe because I always feel that she’s stealing both my best friends.

Here’s a confession: I feel insecure towards her. She gets to spend a lot of time with two of the people I value the most in my life. But I realized, I’m getting tired of thinking that she’s my competition. I’m getting tired of feeling that whatever I do, I can never compete with her. And maybe for some reasons, I found out for myself that I’m being a bitch for bitching about her when I shouldn’t.

So, last night, I tweeted about her (not gonna post it here since it’s not very appropriate. I learned this morning that she got mad about it. Come on, I’m not that stupid to tweet one thing if I know it is bad. I was being honest with my opinions. I don’t even know why she got pissed about it when I’m just saying why I felt that way towards her before.

The problem is, she removed me as friend in Facebook. Funny. If she only read my very long status, she will understand. My God. Is it really hard to contain your opinions before you spread news and make the “starter” guilty as damn?

So, in honor of this one helluva of misunderstanding, here’s my status:

Sa mundong ‘to, di bale nang kokonti lang ang nakakakita ng mga mabuting bagay na ginagawa mo. Sadya kasing may mga tao lang na hindi marunong tumingin o di kaya hindi ma-analyze ang mga bagay-bagay.

Alam ko ang lame kung sa FB idadaan, pero there’s no other way. Ayoko namang makipag-usap kasi nakakatakot ang confrontation, baka ma-misinterpret.

Dear P, I don’t really care if you read this, but let me tell you one thing: I’m done giving a damn about you :) Maybe the reason why I hated you was because I always feel that you’re stealing my best friends. But I realized, ano nga ba ang sense ng envy? From now on, gusto kong malaman mo na I’ll try to work my way from feeling insecure towards you. I’m letting gooooooooooooooo of all the clutters. Sorry I was a bitch. But thank you though for helping me realize I was being a bitch. Hahaha.

Corny ko na. Bahala na. I wish you the best. And I hope I can trust you with his heart :)

Maybe if she only read this, she would’ve understood. Probably, she will even think before she says something.

My take? If it all comes down to confrontation, I’ll just try to keep quiet because I know, in the end, he will still side with her, and I’m still wrong.

Social networking kinda sucks, but for some reasons, it also helps. Problems only occur when people refuse to look for what’s real because they only settle for so little (and apparently, for what favors them).


(Photo from Tumblr via hoppip)


About Jashrawr

Jolog, adorkable, defying gravity ♥
This entry was posted in Jash Diaries. Bookmark the permalink.

9 Responses to No Matter How Hard You Try

  1. qqqqqqqqqqqqqqqq says:

    Di naman kasi sya galit o nagalit. San na naman ba nanggaling yan? Ugh.

  2. J-Bstfrnd says:

    Hindi ko s’ya kakampihan dahil gusto ko s’ya, kundi dahil pareho kayong di magkaintindihan. Ang gusto ko lng naman ay makapag-ayos kayo! Kung magkalabasan kayo ng sama ng loob sa isa’t isa, eh di ok. At least nailabas nyo. At ang mahalaga nakapagusap kayo ng maayos at magkaintindihan kayo. Kapag nangyare yun, siguro mapapanatag loob nating lahat :) YUN LANG! Naintindihan mo sana ibig kong sabihin Joyce :) :]

  3. Nevermindthename says:

    Here’s the thing. If you feel that SHE is stealing both of your best of friends. Well, sana wag mo na yun isipin. Kasi, para sakin lang, hindi naman niya kasalanan na mapalapit yung dalawa. I’m not saying na galit ako sayo dahil ganon ang iniisip mo pero sana wag mo na yun isipin kasi nga wala nmang pangaagaw ang nagaganap dito. Okay, sorry kung nangingialam ako. Sinasabihan lang kita dahil feeling ko, masama na ang magisip ng ganyan. Siya kasi ang napapsama. (I’m sorry) Mabuti pa magusap nalng kayo dalawa.

    Sana wag mo na alamin kung sino to. Isa rin sa malalapit NIYONG kaibigan. :)

  4. iunderstandyou says:

    I know what you feel Ate Joyce. I hated her at first,too… pero binalewala ko na sya para maging masaya ako. Kung sa tingin mo, nawawala na sa’yo yung dalwa mong bestfriend. Wag kang maghabol kasi kaya nga sila tinawag na BEST FRIEND para no matter what happens, kayo pa din ang mgkksma. Pag iniwan ka nila, it’s their loss because you’re such a good friend. :) Cheer up. Marami pa jang pwedeng kaibiganin. Walang kwenta yang mga bestfriend mo kapag di ka nila best friend. Love yah ;)

  5. SomeoneSarcatsic says:

    I just can’t understand why ALMOST all of ESEP specially A hates her! Wala lang.

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